Adult Children Tough Love

Tough love is a hard situation to endure, but it is necessary at some point for all teenagers and young adults. Who suffers worse, the parents or the eighteen-year-old or older children who are experiencing the tough love? That question can be answered in a few different ways, but the real answer is everyone suffers at different levels.

Tough love is forcing your children to do something for their own good, to make them stronger. Tough love can mature a child who thinks they are in charge, but that child should be eighteen-year-old or older in most states before you can kick them out of the house. If that child is under 18 then a short stay in foster care allows them to see how good they have it at home.

This article focuses on those children who are eighteen-year-old or older, still in school or not, who live at home and contribute little to the home but stress. The law here in Pennsylvania states that a parent can evict an adult child from their home if that child is unruly even if that child is still in school.

Tough love is forcing them out of the house to experience life on their own, since they feel as if they know everything. If the weather is warm, they will be fine sleeping outside in any small town. They will seek shelter from a friend, they will find food, and they will learn that home is simply not as bad as living on their own.

Resist the urge to allow them to come back in the house after a few days on their own. Just as a younger child, will not learn lessons in being mouthy in a few hours neither will a teenager. Just think of tough love as an extended time out where the child is removed from the house, cut off all ties with the eighteen-year-old or older child and let them fend for themselves for a week or up to a month depending on the severity of the problem.

Resist the urge to set out food for the eighteen-year-old or older child, as the lessons being learned will be better learned if they are forced to suffer for a bit and that includes being hungry. They will not go hungry for long as they have the good and bad friends, who they will ask for food and drink. Perhaps they will learn that the good friends have better food and will leave the bad friends behind. Tough love is hard but so necessary at times.

Resist the urge to set up a tent in the backyard or otherwise provide shelter for the eighteen-year-old or older child, because you are trying to show them that life is hard, unless you go with the flow and follow the rules. Do not reward them for the bad behavior by providing shelter, let them see how life is without you.

It is a hard thing to do, as you are not sure how your eighteen-year-old or older child is fairing without your protection. The child will not learn the necessary lessons if you coddle them, doing things for them and allow them to rule the house. Tough love will cure that rebellion in them, as that child will humble themselves to ask for the help they need.

Giving the eighteen-year-old or older child a week or more to fend for themselves will show them a few things, such as your seriousness about rules, that life is not simple nor sweet, and that you must work together to accomplish the good life. Experts do not call this tough love for nothing, it is stressful for the children as well as the parents.

Tough love will show your child how good they had a life at home and it will settle them down. If you have never had to do it, then you are among the minority of parents who have children who never give them any trouble.

Once the eighteen-year-old or older child has been out of the home for a while, arrange for a meeting with that child. If tough love has worked the magic with which it was created you will see a child who is mellowed out with time.

A clear set of rules must be established before they should be allowed to come home following tough love. The rules should include chores, curfews, as well as contributing to the family in other ways. It does not hurt an eighteen-year-old or older child to help out with family chores, pay rent, or follow a curfew. Actually, all these help an eighteen-year-old or older child become a responsible adult as well as help the rest of the family.

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Nightmares, Night terrors, dealing with them

Nightmares are terrible to a child as a parent it is unpleasant to watch a child go through this unnecessary terror. There is an answer to those nightmares and night terrors that seem to wake up the whole household and it will get rid of monsters and those creatures, which cause the nightmares.

I am a parent of three children and when they were, little they had their share of nightmares featuring boogiemen and other creatures of the night. I came up with a good idea of making a monster be gone spray that we used nightly as they were tucked into their beds and this was a neat little trick to keep the monsters away, or so they thought.

We as adults know the monsters are just a figment of over active imaginations so we can combat that with the monster be gone spray. Purchase a small unique spray bottle in your local grocery store or department store. Design a label on your computer and attach it to the bottle. Fill the bottle 2/3 of the way with water and add in a scent and it suddenly becomes monster be gone spray. I used vanilla extract, but peppermint oil would work as well.

Tell the children this is monster be gone spray and that it must be sprayed by an adult to work properly. This spray being mostly water will not harm blankets or anything the mist falls on, and it will send the air. You could spray it on the pillowcase of your child as an extra measure to keep the monsters gone.

We used monster be gone spray for a few months only, I told my children that since it was sprayed so often the monsters decided to move along and bother others. Soon there was no need to use the spray and nightmares were outdated. Now they are teenagers and they know the truth of the monster be gone spray but that is fine, as it served its purpose and helped them sleep better.

There are measures that parents can take to assure that monsters and boogiemen stay away from your child and they follow this paragraph.

Bring a calm atmosphere within the home goes a long ways in how a child acts during the day and how that child sleeps at night as well. Minimize the anger and violence the child sees if possible, in cases of domestic violence, remedy the situation for you and the child both by leaving the home.

Talk the child how things are at school perhaps a bully is bothering the child; try as a loving parent to remedy the situation. Change classrooms or schools if needed to avoid a bully.

Keep the violent shows off your television. If there is violence on the television programs, a child watches that child may not be able to process that it is pretend and it may reoccur within the dreams for that child.

Schedule meals at a regular time and stick to the schedule. Sometimes when children get out of a schedule, their young minds cannot process the new events and it manifests as nightmares.

Relaxing your child before bedtime goes a long way towards helping them ease into sleep, so that everyone in the entire family gets a good nights rest safe from monsters. Try setting up a good bedtime ritual of relaxing time curled up with a good book with a caring parent.

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Finger Painting with Preschoolers $ Pudding

Finger painting with preschoolers can be a very fun thing to do, but when these little ones eat the paint, it becomes a very big problem. Even though preschool paints are not toxic, a parent normally wonders about this often. I know of a preschool paint which is entirely toxic and it will not matter how much these preschoolers eat.

Pudding, which can easily be made and is certainly non- toxic, makes a wonderful paint for preschoolers, look at all the colors of paint you have when you use a box of Jell-o instant pudding. Finger painting with preschoolers will an excellent activity, to encourage their minds and allows them to have natural fun.

Go ahead and mix up a box or two of Jell-o instant pudding, and lay a piece of white printer paper in front of your child. Finger painting with preschoolers can begin by adding a spoonful of pudding to the paper and showing them how to do it but running your finger thru the pudding yourself.

Make swirls, circles, or squares, so them how it is done, they will soon get the idea of how to finger paint with the Jell-o instant pudding. Finger painting with preschoolers just took on a completely new meaning, and they can eat the paint, which is natural for them to do.

Preschoolers love to play with their food, so this appears natural to them and is the perfect activity for one and a half year olds right up to first graders; yes, all ages of the preschoolers can have fun with this one. Finger painting with preschoolers is also a great skill building activity.

This is great hand and eye coordination, fine motor skills, cognitive developing and just about everything else, but above all it helps them to become creative and gives a good basic start to the world of crafts. Finger painting with preschoolers gets messy.

Preschoolers will get messy that is for sure, but they have so much fun with it as one can imagine, so make sure to paint with pudding on a floor that is washable, in clothes, which are washable. Finger painting with preschoolers will be messy but clean up is a breeze with regular mopping of the floor, a sponge on surfaces, and a washing machine for the clothes.

This idea comes from one activity that happened many years ago when I just had my daughter and she was about one and a half and was involved in a preschooler playtime group on post over in South Korea. Finger painting with preschoolers, many preschoolers was a mommy and me activity that the children and their moms seemed to all enjoy.

Nancy the playgroup director had two daughters Chelsea and Abigail and together with any other moms and preschoolers, we gathered for fun group activities on a weekly basis. Amber and I both very much enjoyed the finger painting with preschoolers' activities more then the other activities.

When we did the finger painting with preschoolers' activity, we used the huge gym on post, and the entire gym floor would be filled with moms and little ones laying on the floor finger painting with jell-o brand instant pudding. Each mom cleaned up her child's mess, and we had a story and snack time as the paintings died enough to take them home.

When we came home to Pennsylvania, Amber and I still enjoyed this finger painting with preschoolers, so we began the tradition her with her cousins whom I used to baby sit. We all had fun, and I did not need to worry about toxic paints.

Free Play for Kids, Memories

The best free games for children to play encourage their imagination and creativity. Those pastimes which encourage the use of motor skills in conjunction with imagination are the best free games.

When I was growing up, back before video games we kids had to come up with our own best free games and we had so much fun. Very few of us were over weight, we had deep natural tans from being outside from sun up until sun down. We swam, played baseball, climbed trees, and chased the cows until we would be caught then we would be put on restriction for a while but we sure enjoyed the best free games out imaginations could conjure up.

Swimming was one of the best free games for us kids of the hill, it kept us cool on the long hot summer days. The swimming hole in the creek we spent countless hours swimming in could be seen from our house, so mom never worried about us.

She did watch us closely though, so much so that one day we girls though we would sneak in some swimming after mom told us to not get our clothes wet. Our clothes were tossed up on the bank so we would not get them wet, and we thought we were following her rules but that was not to be. We all got restricted to the house and could not go near the creek for 3 days, three very long days indeed without the best free games we loved.

You see the creek was in a field and many of the best free games we could think of were played down there. All off them were off limits to us as much as the creek was for those three days our favorite, the best free games were not to be played. We could not go fishing, or hunting for the crabs, which were two of the best games that kept us so entertained. We often would build dams to trap the little fish in the creek, to keep them alive when the hot summer sun would dry up the creek bed.

Over the creek laid huge trees with low hung branches that we used to ride upon, I am not sure the name of these trees, but the branches would swing but not break and we loved them. It was one of the best free games to play down by the creek, as when we closed our eyes we could be riding a horse or flying on an air plane.on the banks of the creek in the field.

We would play some of the best free games like tag where we would run and chase each other all over. We just did not play any form of tag, we would play freeze tag everyone would run and when the person who was it tagged a person; you had to freeze in your position. Some of the positions we were froze into were silly or uncomfortable but we loved it.

We would also play TV tag in which you could yell out the name of a television show before you were tagged and you were free. We played music tag and just about every kind of tag we could think on the banks of that creek. These were some of the best free games to play on a hot summer day down by the creek and when we got restricted from the creek we also got restricted from playing all these other things.

We played baseball, football, and Frisbee these were the best free games for our activity filled days, good for our bodies and good for moral. We learned about helping each other by being on teams, we played hard sometimes too hard like when my nose got broken in a rough game of touch football with the boys in the neighborhood.

Our imaginations soared and we learned all about creativity and problem solving skills, but most of all we had so much fun while playing the best free games we could think of.

The only cost of all these best free games we played was the bumps, bruises and occasionally broken bones or twisted ankles but the knowledge we learned and the fun we had were priceless.

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Parenting Teens, Doing Chores

If you are wondering how to get your teenagers to do chores around the home, I have found the solution. To some people I imagine it will sound harsh but for those of us who live with a sloppy teenager well you understand how hard it is sometimes to get teenagers to do chores around the home.

I have did the asking, begging, pleading, grounding, bribery tricks to no avail this time and after being so tired of looking at the undone chores around the house I decided to take it upon my self and inconvenience them. I decided to clean my house in the middle of the night, this way they cannot get a good nights sleep. Perhaps I can re-teach my teenagers to do chores around the home when it is daylight.

Usually they are not like this, they do things when asked, but for the past two weeks I have been ill with migraines and of course I had do deal with the dreaded RA flare. They did not do chores around the house, as I have felt well enough to stand I have seen the dishes were done.

Some days it took me over an hour of doing the dishes, seeing that I could only stand for about ten minutes at a time before the pain got so bad in my knees. They skipped their chores around the home because I only asked one time, because I was either sleeping or too tired to deal with their excuses. Expecting teenagers to do chores around the home, cannot be done at least in my house without some constant nagging with my younger two.

This is how I found myself doing double duty with my regular freelance work and doing my teenagers chores around the home in the middle of the night, because I am finally feeling better and wish to teach them a lesson. I have a four-year-old granddaughter in my house usually but on the weekends, she goes to her dads so I know cleaning at night here is not bothering her, but it is bothering the teenagers somewhat as I am not being quiet.

I usually am up at night quietly doing my articles when I feel good that is, but tonight that is a different matter all together. I tossed in a load of laundry, did a few dishes, or vacuumed in between writing my articles and somewhere along the night all work was done. I know some of you maybe wondering how this will teach teenagers to do chores around the home. It is called inconveniencing and denying them.

In our house, teenagers do chores around the home in order to get some spending cash to do fun things during the weekend. Tonight I will not be parting with any money nor will I be buying a pizza and wings.

You see by doing their chores around the home I get to keep their allowance for the week, and since it is Friday, I am thinking a fish fry will be wonderful and that is their allowance. Lesson to my teenagers priceless I hope, and what I deserve a night out without them.

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